December

In December, I saw my GP again she mentioned the condition ‘Fibromyalgia’ this was the first time I had considered this condition, I had this name before but briefly I believe it was on a poster at the chemist in the hospital but I had not paid much attention as my vision was quite bad.

My GP put me on Tramadol painkillers which seemed to help somewhat they took the edge off of the pain somewhat but I only took them if I really needed to I know they can be addictive and I don’t like relying on things.

Around the middle of December I received a letter from my work advising that I had used up all of my sick pay and that I was not entitled to any more, I really could have done without this so close to Christmas. I had done most of my Christmas shopping online.

It was just before christmas all the tests had been completed by the Urologist i went back to see her, she told me i had weak bladder tone but she was not sure of the reason behind this, i had to have training to teach myself how to do intermitant self catheterisation; its not pleasant and its all adding to the feeling that both emotionally and physically i am falling apart.

I have always enjoying using my laptop, you could say i have always been a bit of a whizz on computers. I am still able to use my laptop but only for short periods as I struggle with concentration, I have to use my dimmed glasses which are like sunglasses and have the laptop

screen dimmed. I am unable to watch TV for long periods of time and the brightness does hurt. I have been listening to audio books somewhat as I can’t read books as my vision has become quite blurry.

Christmas came and went in a crazy blur of pain i spent some time with family but spent as much time as i could in bed resting, the smallest amount of activity left me weak and unable to do anything. Somedays i was barely able to leave my head. The tiredness and fatigue started in the beginning in July but i never truely noticed it till Christmas i was going through too much with the pain to deal with anything else to be honest. Now i seemed to have pain everywhere it felt like i was an much older person a 70-80 year old, i am 26 yet some days i am unable to get out of bed unaided and walk to the bathroom this isn’t how its suppost to be.

On Decemember 28^th i had my appointment with the Neurologist i took along a friend as my memory had been getting worse and i knew i was not really with it and would not remember most of the convocation and would probally forget to mention something. I told him the symptoms and he did a few tests, he told me my headaches were called ‘Chronic Chemical Headpain’ but that with the other symptoms that the condition was known as Fibromyalgia. The name at this time didn’t mean much. I made a follow up appointment and thanked him, after all this time i had a name and i could research and maybe find some information about what was wrong with me. He also put me on a medication called Topiramate.