Frustrated.

I had an appointment with my GP yesterday and i tried to explain how much pain i am in, how i am having problems gripping, problems walking etc. I feel she wasnt listening to me. She didnt want to put my pain killers up or offer any advice or alternatives even though i told her the pain was keeping me up all night and the only way i was sleeping was through sheer exhaustion.

She just didnt seen interested at all. I suppose this is what happens when General Doctors dont know anything about Fibromyalgia and i suppose this is happening all over the country as the UK as a whole knows little about the condition. I really wish that i lived somewhere where people knew about fibro.

I have fallen once or twice a day for the last few weeks my legs are getting more and more painful to walk, the only thing that keeps me going is that after thursdays hydrotherapy i will be refered back to my physio and maybe they can do something about it as my GP didnt seem interested at all in it.

She did put my Gabapentin up although i must admit i havent noticed that it helped at all but my fibro seems to be getting worse and worse its so difficult to tell. She has put me up to 1800mg; 600mg 3 times a day.

Also because i spend most of my time in a darkened room, which have done since the beginning of my fibro because of the constance severe migraine which i have photophobia and sensativity to sound with she has prescribed me calcium and vitamin D tablets to stop me getting a deficiency probally could have done with these for the last 18 months though hmm.

I have my first pain clinic in Bognor on monday which should be interesting, i am still quite peaved that Worthing wouldnt take me and the reasons why. When i first became ill with the migraines they believed it was all in my head and they put this on my records which was so wonderful of them and when the other fibro symptoms followed and i had to be refered for pain clinic at Worthing they wrote back saying they couldnt help me as i had mental issues. At least my GP ignored this one. Stupid people grr.

The Fibro fog seems to be getting worse and worse i am struggling more in convosations to remember simple words like "microwave" and "car" and even peoples names; people in my family but only minutes later i remember them again, it makes me feel so stupid, almost to the point of crazy. I also seem to be developing my stutter back slowly which only makes me more concious of speaking. I am just frustrated overall i feel like i am screaming but no one is listening.

I am fed up everything i just want my life back.